


in circles

by pearltiare



Category: BanG Dream! (Anime), BanG Dream! Girl's Band Party! (Video Game)
Genre: Confessions, F/F, Fluff, RAISE A SUILEN - Freeform, all lowercase, if u leave supportive comments i give u a big kiss /p, im really bending over backwards to write ras fics rn, space between punctuation, what the fuck gay little bandmates ???????
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-07
Updated: 2020-10-07
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:55:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26865502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pearltiare/pseuds/pearltiare
Summary: pareo and chu2 have been close for months now, and so have the other members of raise a suilen- but when chu2 realizes she may be falling for her band's keyboardist, she feels as if she's running circles around her.
Relationships: Nyubara Reona/Tamade Chiyu
Comments: 6
Kudos: 32





	in circles

having been with raise a suilen for a few months, performing at the budokan, growing closer together with every passing day, all of it was so, so incredibly nice to chu2. it's not like she would admit it out loud, or say she was glad to be closer to her band mates, but it's still exactly how she did feel. part of being a band was knowing your members, forming a bond, a friendship with them. as much as she could try to deny it, it was obvious that after their temporary split-up, raise a suilen's music quality, performance, sound, almost everything improved tremendously. and her friendship with pareo especially had also improved in such a significant amount, chu2 couldn't tell if it was real.

" _alright, alright !_ sacred world, up next, don't be slacking, _okay ?_ masking- you're going a little too easy on the drums today ! layer- you seem distracted, don't tell me you're thinking about hanazono again. save it for later ! _let's go !_ "

chu2 said behind her dj setup, clapping along with her words. masuki sighed and nodded, rei put her phone onto chu2's desk hoping that if she wasn't waiting for a text, she'd eventually clear her mind. pareo was standing by her keyboard, smiling as usual with her hands clasped together. this made the tiny producer's heart skip a beat, but she'd be damned if anyone were to notice. she simply slipped her headphones up from her neck back onto her head and queued for the music to begin. the studio was filled with the melody of their newest single, which was dropping in only a week. anyone who knew chu2 knew that she did _not_ play nice when it came to new releases. she didn't have a care in the world how tired or unmotivated the girls are, she just had her sights on getting the perfect sound. she didn't just want for ras to sound like the studio recording, she wanted them to sound _better_ than the studio recording.

when all was finished and the dj was satisfied with their practice for the day, masuki left promptly, as well as rokka, since they both had to be at work that evening. rei had plans to 'just hang out' with tae, so that left chu2 and pareo alone, in the studio, together. just the two of them. just chu2 and pareo, just pareo and chu2. god.. as if the dj wasn't already high-strung with anxiety, this just had to be how it turned out. she figured she'd just make up some excuse to get the keyboardist out for a while, so she could sort her thoughts and feelings. not that that was easy for her in any regard, feelings or not, but the least she could do was try.

speaking of pareo, she was now packing up her keyboard and her bag, making sure her metro card was in the right spot and had enough on it to be able to go home. she was humming the tune of 'riot' softly, and shot chu2 a smile as soon as she finished packing. the two had a sleepover planned for the night, but chu2 had to _think,_ what could she do to temporarily get pareo out ? it wasn't like she had the heart to just kick her out bluntly, and it's not like she didn't want pareo with her, she just needed to get herself together for a moment. thirty minutes, maybe an hour was all the dj needed.

"pareo ! can you run by the gas station and pick up some jerky ? i'll pay for it."

"but chu2, i thought you already had jerky ? we went to get some yesterday !"

pareo replied, in her usual optimistic tone. _shit._ she was right, and chu2 knew damn well that she had enough jerky to last her at least another week, but she would just have to hope and pray that the girl in front of her wouldn't mind and would just go.

"but, if that's what chu2 wants, pareo is more than happy to help !"

_thank god._ she would probably have around a month's supply of jerky now, but hey, nothing wrong with being ahead, right ? it would just save the tiny producer a few trips to gas stations and grocery shops. chu2 grabbed her wallet from her blazer pocket and gave _¥_ 2500 yen to the taller girl, to which she skipped out of the studio and peeked out the door, in a sing-song voice,  


"pareo will be back soon, hang tight chu2 !"

and as soon as she heard that door close, chu2 threw her head back and let out a deep sigh. god, chu2 was not the type to get caught up in her emotions, especially when it came to her emotions concerning other people. yet now, she seemed so distracted, her guard was down more often than she'd ever like it to be, and she couldn't stop _thinking_ about her, especially when it came time for chu2 to go to bed. chu2 and pareo had spent many nights together, alone, at the dj's penthouse, they've texted for hours on end countless times. yet the girl never felt anything other than mutual respect and (platonic) love for her. so what the hell was so different this time, why was her mind so scattered and her feelings even more so ?

for chu2, her feelings were usually, if not always kept under wraps. it was just second nature to her by now, to be hiding her true emotions. of course, she had the occasional emotional outburst, and she had her ways of expressing her feelings while alone, but in front of people, _especially_ in front of the members of raise a suilen, she had mile-high concrete emotional walls built, that wrecking balls and cranes could only imagine to destroy. chu2 was a tough girl, but despite how much she pretended to be, she wasn't made of stone, and she had to face her thoughts and emotions eventually.

now, to begin, chu2 was gonna have to find some kind of label to put onto her feelings. they weren't platonic, that was for sure, but was it some childish infatuation or actual love ? that was a trick question that chu2 wasn't sure she had the answer to yet. but god- chu2 couldn't exactly overthink it either, which made the whole situation all the more frustrating. if chu2 hid her feelings, they would eventually build up and explode at any possible moment, but if she was honest with herself, that would mean she'd actually have to do something about said feelings. the producer felt like she was running around in circles, around and around yet never getting to the actual point, which would be the most beneficial to her.

chu2 wasn't gonna sit here, in her huge chair (no she wasn't too short, the chair was just too big) just denying left and right that she cared for pareo. pareo was definitely the closest friend she had out of raise a suilen, or rather, the closest friend she had period. constantly getting praise, help and advice from the keyboardist meant more to her than she could ever possibly express. she never saw herself as deserving of such kind words, yet every single time the taller girl mentioned just how important to her she was, and how she pulled her out of the darkness, chu2's heartstrings were pulled a little. she cared for the girl, more than she knew, yet she never quite could properly express it or get that point across.

to try and distract herself, chu2 jumped out of her seat and began organizing the sheet music at her desk, and trying to put everything in its respective folders. it's not that the producer was a messy person, she really wasn't, but her desk looked like something straight out of hoarders. having so much notes, sheet music and choreography to write down all by herself was not an easy task at all, and when she was done, she was normally too tired to bother cleaning up said papers. so she left them there. but she figured that now, it was time to gather her things and put them all back into the folders they belonged in. if someone outside of ras were to find out that her workspace was in shambles, it could possibly reflect badly on the band, and chu2 simply couldn't have that.

"i'm back, with three different flavors of jerky for variety !~"

in the middle of putting unfinished sheet music away, the dj heard the door swing open. the amount of time passed didn't quite hit chu2, but it had now been close to an hour since pareo had gone to get some jerky, and she still didn't know what in the absolute hell she was going to do about her feelings. her completely platonic, normal, friendly feelings for the girl. god, who was she kidding ? herself ? chu2 knew for a definite fact that her feelings were in fact romantic, and as she had no experience with any kind of romance, she had no idea what in the hell she was going to do. she couldn't just tell her, that would be too forward, but spending so many rehearsals, shows and sleepovers with pareo without getting her feelings off would be too much anxiety and pain for anxiety for her to handle.

"thank you, pareo."

is the most that the dj could manage to say to her, yet she was even more speechless when she felt pareo grab her hand and begin speed-walking out of the studio and to the penthouse. if pareo knew just what that did to chu2, she may have to lay off, but she didn't. and chu2 didn't particularly know how long she'd be able to handle just how affectionate and soft and loving and- many other adjectives that could accurately describe the girl, but she was getting ahead of herself now. the pair sat down on the couch, and pareo let go of her hand. she had that warm, kind smile on her face that was usually there, and the second her and chu2 made eye contact, the tiny girl swore she forgot to breathe for a moment.

she only looked away, and tried her best to put the girls' focus onto something else.

"you tired ?"

"oh... not really, i slept in late today ! school was delayed, so i was free to sleep for an extra two hours~"

god. okay, chu2. think of something else, think, think, think. something would have to take pareo's mind off of the small producer sitting next to her.

"do you want to watch the new... pastel*palettes live ?"

"oh, i'd love to, but chu2, aren't you acting just a little odd ?"

" _n-no !_ i'm fine, just a little overwhelmed ! sacred world is coming really soon, _you know ?_ "

she half-yelled. if pareo didn't buy that, she wasn't sure what else she could try to say, but luckily, she seemed to leave it alone after that. while it didn't take a genius to figure out that the girl was very, very caring, she wasn't the type to push it too far. she simply got up, grabbed her bag, and headed to the bathroom to change, take her makeup and wig off. chu2 laid down on the arm of the couch and hoped that the couch would just envelope her and bring her into another world, just for a little while. why in the hell was chu2 just now realizing how bad she has it, why is she so... helpless ? it's not like she knew what she was doing. it's not like she had anyone she could go to, or did she ?

pareo came back to the living room in her pajamas, and sat down next to chu2 yet again. she grabbed one of the throw blankets and tossed it over both her and the tiny girl's lap.

"to keep you warm !"

she said in her usual optimistic tone. her pink eyes looked heavy, and chu2 could only hope that the keyboardist would fall asleep soon. she took her headphones down to let them rest around her neck. she looked at pareo laying down on the other arm of the couch, as her eyes drifted shut and she began softly snoring. it was relieving to chu2, that was for sure. but as she was getting up, she couldn't help but notice how awfully peaceful, and how _cute_ she looked. _god, chu2, get it together !_ she shook her head quickly side to side, and headed to her little closet full of blankets to get to sleep herself. normally, chu2 would change into a baggy top and maybe some sweatpants to sleep in, but tonight, she opted to stay in her school uniform. at least the millions of blankets and pillows were warm... like pareo. _no, chu2, shut it ! you're getting ahead of yourself !_

♡

"so, chu2, what did ya call me here for ? ya know i could've just met ya at the studio."

chu2 just sighed and patted the spot on the bench next to her. masuki shrugged and sat down, without saying a word. chu2 was tapping her foot and hoping that she would be able to string together clear words sometime soon.

"chu2, what's up ? somethin' on ya mind ?"

"i... i guess so."

"well ? what are ya waitin' for ? i'm all ears."

chu2 let out another sigh and decided to just... go with it. go with the flow. if she thought about what she was going to say too much, she'd end up just giving both herself and masuki a headache. no matter how much she tried to sugar coat it, she couldn't run around in circles forever.

"i think i'm in love, masking."

and there masuki was, wide-eyed and so so close to just busting out laughing. not in a rude way of course, but the drummer had just never thought she'd hear that from chu2. of course, she understood, although masuki had never been in an actual relationship, she had her fair share of crushes on girls. maybe she hadn't been in love any of those times, but this time, she definitely was. but that was beside the subject, masuki would admit her feelings for rokka one day. this was about chu2, after all, she was the one who called to meet at that park, so she would hold her tongue for today.

"well.. with who ?"

"um.. ah... pareo."

"'kay, now tell me somethin' i don't know."

chu2 made a pouting expression and masuki just chuckled, and lightly punched the redhead's shoulder.

  
"i was just messin' with ya. i feel ya, as much as i can sit here and say i don't. but there ain't no way in hell that pareo doesn't like ya back, like, the girl is attached to ya by the hip !"

chu2's cheeks were now dusted with a light shade of red, and nodded her head. masuki opted to continue,

"but y'know, you bein' so young and all, i get how it can get confusing. i mean, hell, i'm seventeen and still don't know how to deal with my own feelings like that. ya feel me ?"

she was facing the small dj, who was avoiding eye contact, but as chu2 was nodding, the blonde could tell that she was listening. chu2 was quite relieved that one of her band mates could understand how she felt at least, and it was more relieving for said band mate to be older, more experienced. even if she hadn't been in an actual relationship, she had more experience in the field of crushes than the producer.

" _god_ ! i just... i don't know what i'm supposed to do, masking ! i don't want to be too forward, but i don't want to be too awkward around her either... pareo is so... god, she's quick to notice things."

chu2 stammered under her breath. masuki could say that chu2 was right, pareo was a very observant girl. she hated lies, that much was obvious, she never lied herself and she could see straight through dishonesty. it was easy for her to read emotions, and for the keyboardist, chu2 could be read like a best-selling novel. pareo knew chu2 better than anyone, better than herself, even, and she could very easily tell how she was feeling at almost any given moment. the blonde wouldn't be surprised if pareo already knew about chu2's feelings for her, and figured if that was the case, she was either making a plan about what to do or willfully ignoring her. but the past few days, she was more than willing to be just as close to the girl as she always was. so she seriously doubted that.

"i mean, i don't really know what to tell ya, 'cause i don't exactly know what i'd do in that situation myself. ya feel me ? i'm real sorry, chu2."

chu2 nodded and turned to face masuki with a small smile, but then she saw a shit-eating grin tugging at the drummer's lips.

"you wanna smooch her, don't ya choo-choo~"

"i do not !"

chu2 yelled, but masuki just poked her cheeks and started making kissy noises to tease her further.

"choo-choo and pareo sittin' in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-"

"i'll be going home now, thanks masking !"

chu2 grabbed her bag and began running towards the bus stop closest to the park. masuki had good intentions, chu2 knew of that, but she could be a real handful sometimes. especially when it came to anything having to do with the dj. of course, the girl would poke fun at all of the other band mates occasionally, but chu2 seemed to be her favorite. when she was asked why, she never gave a complete answer. only 'because it's fun.' oh well, the only thing chu2 would have to worry about now was actually confessing. masuki didn't have much advice to offer, but it still was nice to have someone to talk to, someone who gets it.

sitting on the bus, she scrolled through her twitter feed to check on what was happening in the world around her. her timeline seemed rather dry today, so she opted to just close out the app and rest her eyes for a little bit. it was around a fifteen minute ride back to chu2's penthouse, so she figured she'd get some rest while she could. sacred world was dropping in two days, and she was absolutely exhausted in every single way. physically, mentally, emotionally. despite being told to please just take a break, chu2 was more than willing to sacrifice her mental and possibly physical well-being for the sake of raise a suilen. but it happened that chu2's eyes were just so, so _heavy,_ and she couldn't help but doze off on the bus.

♡

chu2 was woken up by a tap on her shoulder by the bus driver, and she slowly got up, after stretching. the penthouse couch felt like heaven right now, especially once she realized that tomorrow was the final rehearsal regarding sacred world. one last rehearsal before the release of the song they'd worked so, so hard for. every last member of raise a suilen, but especially chu2. being fourteen years old, yet producing, composing and choreographing her own music was exceptionally tough. the girl couldn't say she'd heard of many others her age who did all of that by themselves, on top of working with four other girls to make that vision a reality. it was worth it, really, but all of that work had to hit eventually. until.. until chu2 heard a knock at the door.

she slowly got up, rubbing her eyes and slowly turned the doorknob. housekeeping, she figured, but she was quite surprised to see a certain tall keyboardist standing in the doorway. she had a lunchbox in her hands, as well as her phone.

"chu2 ! i'm sorry to surprise you, but may pareo come in ?"

chu2 just nodded slowly, still holding onto the doorknob and stepped aside to let the girl inside. pareo sat down on the couch in the living room and began unpacking the lunchbox on her lap, and the shorter girl only stood there staring at her. pareo unwrapped a sandwich and began eating it, and with food still in her mouth she began,

"well, chu2, i thinks there's something you're hiding from pareo !"

chu2 sat down on the couch across from her and shook her head- deny, deny, deny. the girl across from her giggled and continued,

"why, chu2 has been acting a little... strange recently ! i think there's something you've got to say, maybe !"

_shit._ classic pareo, she could just read her that easily, no matter how intently and hard she tried to mask her feelings. it was only a matter of time until she found out, really, whether it be just a hunch or through an outside source. chu2 knew masuki wasn't one to gossip, so surely she couldn't have told her. it was simple now, really, she could've guessed that pareo was some kind of psychic.

" _i'm fine,_ "

chu2 said in a stern tone. pareo tilted her head to the side a little, and it was quite obvious to the producer that she wasn't buying it. of course she wasn't, that was just pareo being pareo.

"really, don't worry about me."

pareo took another bite out of her sandwich, and all the while was making rather intense eye contact with chu2. she knew what she was doing, and although she wouldn't outwardly admit it, the keyboardist was quite the sneaky girl. she knew how to get answers out of someone, without having any ill intent or lying. she was an honest girl, and right now, she wanted chu2 to be honest as well. she could tell it was something concerning her, at least most likely, yet it seemed to fly right on over her head.

"chu2, you know that if you need something, pareo is here and willing to listen ! that's what your keyboard maid is here for, right ?"

_god._ chu2 wasn't against pareo calling herself her keyboard maid, but it seemed so often that she reduced herself to be _only_ her keyboard maid. if she knew just how special, how amazing and one of a kind she saw her as, maybe she would become more confident. maybe even confident enough to fully commit and dye her hair, or confront her parents and try to have a better relationship with them. wasn't it strange, though, that despite how many compliments she received, nor how much praise, she couldn't ever see herself in a positive light ? despite all of the fronts pareo put up, she was still quite an insecure, reserved girl, and in that regard, chu2 could relate. she had spent so much of her life, and even now was masking her true emotions and putting up wall after wall.

but pareo, it seemed, was trying to break down those walls one by one, and that absolutely terrified chu2. being vulnerable was _not_ something that chu2 could particularly say she was ready for, especially when it came to the object of her affection. being vulnerable to chu2 equaled weakness, and she couldn't stand to be perceived as weak. she had built an entire band from the ground up, she had made herself a name as a dj and producer, and one of the youngest at that. she couldn't just go back on all of that now, she just simply couldn't.

pareo set her lunchbox down and moved across the room to sit next to the tiny girl, her knees touching her thighs. she grabbed her hands and pleaded with her,

"please, chu2, pareo promises not to judge. i won't tell a soul !"

chu2 gulped, and looked down. her palms were beginning to sweat a little, and her heartbeat was quickening. she was under pressure, too much pressure, and she was now beginning to crack. but it wasn't like she felt cornered, or anything, in fact, it felt nice for pareo to be taking to her so kindly.

"i.. pareo..."

she squeezed her hand, and nodded, urging for the girl next to her to continue.

"pareo.... i.. i. i think i may be.. god, what is the word.. in love, with you. i'm trying to run from the feelings, but i keep going in circles. i didn't think i of all people could feel this way but... you know, shit happens, i guess."

pareo kept hold of the girl's small hand, and made eye contact with her. she had a warm smile on her face, tears threatening to spill from her eyes. she said in a soft tone,

"i was hoping you'd say that."

chu2 could swear that she melted right then and there. did this mean that pareo returned her feelings, or did it mean that pareo knew all along ? maybe both ? but she didn't bother asking, she only kept hold of her hand and hoped that the girl would be in love with her too. maybe not today, but one day. would she ask ? no. she didn't want to. chu2 was simply too afraid. but her question was answered when she felt a hand gently cupping her cheek. she saw the girl leaning in close to her, then closing the distance between them. if chu2 could float, she would be up in the clouds right now. going in circles, in a loop seemed to be a thing of the past now, chu2 could only move forward- with pareo by her side.

when they broke apart, pareo had her arms wrapped around chu2's waist tightly, and looking down at her with the most precious, loving gaze, as if she were a rare jewel.

"i love you, chu2 !"

"i.. i love you too."


End file.
